Romantic Realist’s Amusing Musings on Sylvester Stallone's Expendable 3

Romantic Realist’s Amusing Musings (WIP) on:

Sylvester Stallone Says EXPENDABLES 3 Will Have A MOUNTAIN OF SURPRISES

Read more at http://www.inquisitr.com/570166/sylvester-stallone-says-expendables-3-will-have-a-mountain-of-surprises/

The Expendables 3, according to Sylvester Stallone, will have a Mountain of surprises for fans of the hit series.  As you may know, our action hero, also known as Rambo and Rocky Balboa, is a “large, muscular man with dark hair and an asymmetrical face,” a description given by Ping Fu in her recent memoir, Bend, Not Break: A Life in Two Worlds.

Amused, I wonder whether he read Ping Fu’s memoir, the original name of which was supposed to be Life Is A Mountain Range.  “Sometimes to go up, you have to go down first,” Ping Fu said.  

Indeed, surprises, gossips and tales abound in Hollywood, Research Triangle, and the Wild, Wild West.

Stallone is still in the process of writing the script for the sequel.  It is unclear to me whether he is soliciting comments from his fans.  If he is, I would suggest that he reads pages 60-61 of Ping Fu’s Bend, Not Break, and try to adapt the rear-end anecdote described by Ping Fu therein into his Expendables 3.  The previous Expendables were rated R.  The target audience for Expendables 3 are mature enough for any rear-end collision or frontal assault that may be shown on screen. 

A Chinese restaurant in Santa Fe would be an excellent setting for an action movie starring a born again Catholic who rediscovered his childhood faith.  The movie would not be merely action packed, but it would also be truly inspirational and spiritual.  A Chinese waitress who has discovered her authentic self will provide the harmonious fusion of East and West.   Some chuckling by unnamed Asian American male characters in the back room would further corroborate Sir Harold Evans’ suggestion of their hermaphroditic qualities—stereotypes reminiscent of Fu Manchu that can be found in a black and white classic from the first half of the 20^th Century.

To give us a peek at what’s happening behind-the-scenes, Stallone recently Tweeted some answers.  I do not have a Tweeter account, because I am no longer a Young Blood.  Now, older and maybe wiser but technologically challenged, I am humbly asking you to let me know if there is any Chinese waitress struggling to support her American Dream in any of Stallone’s Tweets.

Yes, Sylvester Stallone did express his intention to add a few Young Blood to the cast.  Let’s see whether there will be a Young Blood who is a masculine Asian American.  I watched Jackie Chan’s Drunken Master as a little boy.  By implication, if I am not a Young Blood, neither is Jackie Chan.  Moreover, Jackie Chan is not Asian American.  He grew up and lives in Hong Kong.  It is time to have a home grown Asian American as one of the Young Blood in the next Expendables, as a testament that Asian Americans are no longer simply expendables.  There are many descendants of Chinese whose sweat and blood contributed to the building of our Transcontinental Railroad.  These home grown Asian Americans should at least be given an equal opportunity to become the next Young Blood.

The last Expendables (second one of this proposed trilogy) was more popular with moviegoers overseas than it was in the United States. Expendables 2 generated $200 million in foreign markets, enormous by comparison to the $85 million in the United States. I paid $6 (matinee discount ticket) to watch Expendables 2, and the entertainment value of the movie was definitely more than $6 out-of-pocket investment I made.  Therefore, Stallone’s team can easily conclude that, if they do not pay attention to Asian Americans in the United States, the domestic revenue for Expendable 2 would have been less than $84,999,994. 

I would not have paid my money to see a movie by a Hollywood star who treats a Chinese waitress the way Ping Fu described in her memoir.  The fact that she was fresh out of boat, or just landed at a New Mexico airport, is not a reason not to treat her with dignity and respect deserved by all women here in the United States. 

In non-fictional real life, any unsolicited, unwarranted rear end or front end contact is inappropriate.  Being slapped and asking “Do It Again” is not an adequate apology.

If another Asian American, a He, a She, or a Hermaphrodite a la Sir Harold Evans’ vocabulary, shares my way of thinking and decides not to see the next Expendables as a matter of principle, Stallone’s team might lose another $6 to $12 in box office revenue.  When you multiply $6 to $12 by the number of Asian Americans living, working and contributing to the United States, the financial consequence might be more substantial than we can currently anticipate.

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