Romantic Realist’s Amusing Musings on Sylvester Stallone's Expendable 3

Romantic Realist’s Amusing Musings (WIP) on:

Sylvester Stallone Says EXPENDABLES 3 Will Have A MOUNTAIN OF SURPRISES

Read more at http://www.inquisitr.com/570166/sylvester-stallone-says-expendables-3-will-have-a-mountain-of-surprises/

The Expendables 3, according to Sylvester Stallone, will have a Mountain of surprises for fans of the hit series.  As you may know, our action hero, also known as Rambo and Rocky Balboa, is a “large, muscular man with dark hair and an asymmetrical face,” a description given by Ping Fu in her recent memoir, Bend, Not Break: A Life in Two Worlds.

Amused, I wonder whether he read Ping Fu’s memoir, the original name of which was supposed to be Life Is A Mountain Range.  “Sometimes to go up, you have to go down first,” Ping Fu said.  

Indeed, surprises, gossips and tales abound in Hollywood, Research Triangle, and the Wild, Wild West.

Stallone is still in the process of writing the script for the sequel.  It is unclear to me whether he is soliciting comments from his fans.  If he is, I would suggest that he reads pages 60-61 of Ping Fu’s Bend, Not Break, and try to adapt the rear-end anecdote described by Ping Fu therein into his Expendables 3.  The previous Expendables were rated R.  The target audience for Expendables 3 are mature enough for any rear-end collision or frontal assault that may be shown on screen. 

A Chinese restaurant in Santa Fe would be an excellent setting for an action movie starring a born again Catholic who rediscovered his childhood faith.  The movie would not be merely action packed, but it would also be truly inspirational and spiritual.  A Chinese waitress who has discovered her authentic self will provide the harmonious fusion of East and West.   Some chuckling by unnamed Asian American male characters in the back room would further corroborate Sir Harold Evans’ suggestion of their hermaphroditic qualities—stereotypes reminiscent of Fu Manchu that can be found in a black and white classic from the first half of the 20^th Century.

To give us a peek at what’s happening behind-the-scenes, Stallone recently Tweeted some answers.  I do not have a Tweeter account, because I am no longer a Young Blood.  Now, older and maybe wiser but technologically challenged, I am humbly asking you to let me know if there is any Chinese waitress struggling to support her American Dream in any of Stallone’s Tweets.

Yes, Sylvester Stallone did express his intention to add a few Young Blood to the cast.  Let’s see whether there will be a Young Blood who is a masculine Asian American.  I watched Jackie Chan’s Drunken Master as a little boy.  By implication, if I am not a Young Blood, neither is Jackie Chan.  Moreover, Jackie Chan is not Asian American.  He grew up and lives in Hong Kong.  It is time to have a home grown Asian American as one of the Young Blood in the next Expendables, as a testament that Asian Americans are no longer simply expendables.  There are many descendants of Chinese whose sweat and blood contributed to the building of our Transcontinental Railroad.  These home grown Asian Americans should at least be given an equal opportunity to become the next Young Blood.

The last Expendables (second one of this proposed trilogy) was more popular with moviegoers overseas than it was in the United States. Expendables 2 generated $200 million in foreign markets, enormous by comparison to the $85 million in the United States. I paid $6 (matinee discount ticket) to watch Expendables 2, and the entertainment value of the movie was definitely more than $6 out-of-pocket investment I made.  Therefore, Stallone’s team can easily conclude that, if they do not pay attention to Asian Americans in the United States, the domestic revenue for Expendable 2 would have been less than $84,999,994. 

I would not have paid my money to see a movie by a Hollywood star who treats a Chinese waitress the way Ping Fu described in her memoir.  The fact that she was fresh out of boat, or just landed at a New Mexico airport, is not a reason not to treat her with dignity and respect deserved by all women here in the United States. 

In non-fictional real life, any unsolicited, unwarranted rear end or front end contact is inappropriate.  Being slapped and asking “Do It Again” is not an adequate apology.

If another Asian American, a He, a She, or a Hermaphrodite a la Sir Harold Evans’ vocabulary, shares my way of thinking and decides not to see the next Expendables as a matter of principle, Stallone’s team might lose another $6 to $12 in box office revenue.  When you multiply $6 to $12 by the number of Asian Americans living, working and contributing to the United States, the financial consequence might be more substantial than we can currently anticipate.

http://bendnotbreak-comments.blogspot.com/2013/03/romantic-realists-amusing-musings-on.html

Ode to Sylvester Stallone’s Rear End Encounter in Bend, Not Break

SYLVESTER’S REAR END ENCOUNTER, BEND, AND BREAK


Ode to Sylvester Stallone, a famous action hero, in his Rambo days,
a large, muscular man with dark hair and,
of course, an asymmetrical face;
just back from his Vietnam tour of duty,
dutifully he serve our country, reminiscing his Asian days.

Santa Fe was an artistic city, second home to Hollywood stars.

There was a Chinese restaurant, somewhere in New Mexico,

where Ping Fu earned her way;

Linda Evans, John Wayne, and Miles Davis all came to her restaurant,

Each of these three served with a cup of tea, indeed,

Served by Perfectly Ping, a foreign student from China, in need.

Yes, John Wayne, who passed away in 1979, was there,

Perfectly Ping said, even though 1984 was the year she came;

May his soul rest in peace, and find his place in Santa Fe,

In the middle of nowhere, which used to be America’s Wild West.

“I didn't know who any of these people were”, Perfectly Ping recalled,

“So my boss often assigned me to wait on them.

Three cups of tea she served John Wayne, was not starstruck, no autograph was asked.

One night, a muscular man with dark hair and an asymmetrical face,

Walked into her restaurant, with both of his enormous hands.

R-A-M-B-O was his name-o, Sylvester Stallone to be exact, she was later told.

The boss told me to serve him…..(clap, clap, clap)

R-A-M-B-O was his name-o, or Sylvester Stallone, later she wrote.

She approached the table. "What would you like to drink?"

A virtuous Chinese women, politely she asked.

The man said nothing, but startled her by reaching around,

With his hands, the right one being an enormous one,

and grabbing her rear end with his right hand, she wrote,

what he did with the left one, she does not recall.

Without hesitating for a second, Perfectly Ping slapped Rambo on the cheek, hard.

Then she gasped, “What had I done? Surely the boss would fire me”

What she did to Rambo was insolent behavior;

What Rambo did, oh boy, was for the glory of his country.

The man sat quietly for a heartbeat, staring her straight in the eyes.

“Does she know kung fu?  Is she daughter of Bruce Lee?” perhaps he pondered.

Rediscovering his early childhood faith, remembering

That a Catholic priest said, This is the Gospel according to St. Matthews:

But I tell you, do not resist an evil person.

If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also

Then he laughed and said, in an old-fashioned gentlemen’s way, "DO IT AGAIN."

“Do it again?” she asked; “Please, Thank You, Help,” she said.

She raced back to the kitchen, Chinese mentality still in her head,

still convinced that she would lose her job.

But everyone who had witnessed the event was cheering.

"Ping, you slapped Rambo!"

They squealed with delight. Yes, “Squeal” was the word she used,

to describe the background voice of Chinese American men.

Even the Boss, who had followed to the back room, was chuckling.

“Good job.  Keep your tips.  Business will be good,” the Boss said.

The customer, they told her, was Sylvester Stallone, a famous action hero.

This was a true Gospel, according to her Holy Bible,

Life is a Mountain Range, or Bend, Not Break, is just a name.

Upward, like a Bamboo, she grew.

No longer waitressing.  Instead, she is advising.

Successful, powerful, Barak Obama’s advisor she became.

Transgression of Rambo’s youthful days she recorded,

But no apology from Rambo until today.

“To err is human; to forgive, divine,” a Romantic Realist said,

Wondering what Rambo, a Roman Catholic, would say.

But other American women still has something to say,

“Older, wiser, Rambo, DON’T DO IT AGAIN.”

An apology is requested, for your behavior to a woman,
no matter from where she came, and
regardless of where two of you might have met.  

Ping Fu's Memoir: Bend, Not Break

Bend, Not Break: A Life in Two Worlds (ISBN-10: 1591845521), a New York Times Best Seller.

According to Ping Fu’s memoir, Bend, Not Break, pages 60-61:

Santa Fe was an artistic city, and many Hollywood stars had second homes there. Linda Evans, John Wayne, and Miles Davis all came to our restaurant. I didn't know who any of these people were, so my boss often assigned me to wait on them, knowing that I wouldn't get starstruck or ask for autographs.

One night, a large, muscular man with dark hair and an asymmetrical face came into our restaurant. The boss told me to serve him.

I approached the table. "What would you like to drink?" I asked.

The man said nothing, but startled me by reaching around and grabbing my rear end with his enormous right hand. Without hesitating for a second, I slapped him on the cheek, hard. Then I gasped. What had I done? Surely the boss would fire me for such insolent behavior.

The man sat quietly for a heartbeat, staring me straight in the eyes. Then he laughed and said, "Do it again."

I raced back to the kitchen, still convinced, with my Chinese mentality, that I would lose my job. But everyone who had witnessed the event was cheering. "Ping, you slapped Rambo!" they squealed with delight. Even the boss, who had followed me to the back room, was chuckling. The customer, they told me, was Sylvester Stallone, a famous action hero.

Ping Fu

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ping_Fu

Ping Fu (born 1958) is an American computer scientist and World Wide Web pioneer.^[2] She is the co-founder and CEO of Geomagic, a software development company focused on 3D software and technology for design and engineering, In 2005, Fu was selected by Inc. magazine as its Entrepreneur of the Year.^[1] In 2010, she joined the National Advisory Council on Innovation and Entrepreneurship.^[7] On February 27, 2013, Geomagic was acquired by 3D Systems, and Fu joined 3D Systems as Chief Strategy Officer.^[8][9]. She also sits on the board of the Long Now Foundation.

1. [1] ^  John Brant (Dec 1, 2005)."Entrepreneur of the Year: Ping Fu". Inc.. Mansueto Ventures LLC. Retrieved 26 Sep 2012.
2. [2] ^ James Gilles and Robert Caillau, How the Web Was Born: The Story of the World Wide Web, Oxford University Press, 2000, ISBN: 0192862073 9780192862075
3. [7] ^ "Management Team". About. Geomagic. Retrieved 26 Sep 2012.
4. [8] ^ Hurst, Nathan (January 3, 2013). "Print Giant 3D Systems to Acquire Modeling Company Geomagic". Wired. Wired.com. Retrieved 3 March 2013.
5. [9] ^ "3D Systems Completes Geomagic Acquisition". Rttnews.com. Retrieved 2013-03-01.